Dear Fortitude family,

Welcome back to my midweek motivation! Each day and week brings its own set of experiences and inspirations, compelling me to share my thoughts with all of you.

There are numerous misconceptions that surround the development of mental fortitude, achieving success, and finding true enjoyment in life. It genuinely unsettles me to witness people misinterpreting crucial concepts in these areas. To address this, I've decided to dive into five prevalent topics, providing clarification on what each truly entails.

1. Fall in love with the process, not the outcome: This one is, perhaps, the most important, as it’s indeed true. However, people tend to take it to the extreme. Loving the outcome is okay—I actually encourage it. You should love the outcome when you care deeply about something. Losing sucks; it hurts. Winning is awesome; it brings joy. However, the outcome should not dictate your work ethic the next day, and that’s what loving the process truly means. When you fall in love with the process, you naturally get more of the outcome you desire. If the process didn’t lead to better outcomes, then no one would talk about the process. The outcome still matters; just make sure you do two things: 1. Detach the outcome from who you are. You’re more than wins or losses. 2. Come to train/work with the same intensity the next day, regardless of the outcome.

2. If you love what you do, you’ll never work a day in your life: When you truly love your sport or career, you will do irrational things. However, that doesn’t mean it doesn’t feel like work. It simply means you are willing to endure more of the pain and things that suck. Certainly, there will be things that feel fun to you that sound miserable to others. Nonetheless, it’s still work, and it will take its toll on you. It’s just the pain you’re willing to live with. I talk with people who wrongly identify this concept as this feeling of “once I find this thing I am meant to do, then it will all be easy.” Then, people quit the second it gets hard. We create a false narrative that gives people excuses to quit. When you find something you love to do, it’ll harden you because you learn to embrace the pain.

3. You’re only competing with yourself, no one else: This is one of my core beliefs. However, sometimes you are competing with someone else. You just can’t give that person power over you. This comes back to being able to detach the outcome from your identity. If someone beats you, that’s not a knock against who you are. It’s just a measuring stick for where you need to improve. In every win or every loss, it’s a set of data points on things you need to improve on or double down on. That’s how you become hyper-focused on competing with yourself. However, you can’t collect that data without being in the arena with someone else. When someone lines up in front of you, you should want to destroy them with every fiber of your being. Like I said earlier, just don’t give them power over you. After the game, you’re no longer competing with them. Thank them for the info they gave you and move back to getting better.

4. Chase happiness: Happiness is fleeting. It is impossible to be happy 24/7, all the time. It’s silliness. I heard a wonderful analogy from one of my favorite entrepreneurs, Alex Hormozi: Chasing happiness is like wanting to eat a meal so big that you are never hungry again. It’s impossible. It doesn’t work that way. The way to chase happiness is to have the perspective to choose joy and gratitude in the midst of chaos. I can still mourn and be joyful. I can be upset and be grateful. Learn to differentiate “happiness” from joy and gratitude. Understand your feelings, and choose your emotions.

5. Be authentically you: Sometimes being authentically you isn’t the best answer. If being authentically you means being an asshole or a jerk, then it’s time for introspection. The core of what this concept means is: don’t change who you are or your core beliefs just to fit in with the crowd. It’s important to be authentic, something I pride myself on. However, my definition of authenticity is to be empathetically honest with everyone and to act with true integrity. Since we are constantly evolving as humans, our beliefs will change over time. To combat this, I attach my definition of authenticity to things that never change: honesty and integrity.

Take time to reflect on these misconceptions, identify where they might be skewing your perspective, and take deliberate steps to reframe your mindset. Challenge yourself to embody the true essence of these concepts in your daily life, and watch as your mental fortitude and life satisfaction begin to transform.

Warm regards,

Colin Jonov CEO & Founder, Athletic Fortitude