Dear Fortitude family,

Welcome back to my midweek motivation! Each day and week brings its own set of experiences and inspirations, compelling me to share my thoughts with all of you.

As you all are reading this, I will likely be in the middle of my third knee surgery of this year. I know I have written about this topic in the past. However, given the imminent nature of the procedure, I am in a special kind of headspace. This has been a wildly challenging year for me. I look forward to my year-end reflection. However, that will be a post in a few weeks. The truth is, while I have had many victories and wins this year, it has been one of the most difficult years of my life. I could talk about the ups and downs of business, but that isn't the focus of this piece. The biggest adversity I have been facing this year has truly been my knee. One thing to understand about me is that I am incredibly physically active. I truly don't sit still very often. I can't really explain how much joy I get from running, working out, and playing sports. It's an escape for me. Also, it's important to understand that I can run. Like, run, run. I roll out of bed and will clock a 4.4 40, I promise you. There's really few things like feeling everything else around you is in slow motion. A large part of that I owe to Tim Cortazzo at FSQ training out here in Pittsburgh. Man, he's one of the best in the business. From my pro-day onward when we started training, I can't even describe the growth I experienced. For your understanding, in one year, my vertical went from 30 inches to 38.5. Yes, I can assure you it's true. He's that good. Sadly, starting in January, that was taken away from me this year. I saw three different surgeons and have had two different surgeries to repair a hole in my knee. Yes, a hole. Nope, the answer isn't clear how I got it either, so there won't be any closure. The protocols were the same after each surgery: "Rehab and slowly work your way back to playing a sport." Each time, I'd rehab for six weeks, play the game, and boom, back to square one; swollen knee, stiffness, stabbing pains. My whole life, I've been the "injury-prone" guy. Do you know how hard this shit is to deal with this over and over again? I'm not even playing competitively anymore, and this is still happening to me? What's wrong with me? That's what's been running through my head for 12 months.

Nah, though. Not anymore. I am not a victim. I certainly have it way better than billions and billions of other people. Most importantly, I'm built for this. Even as the tear runs down my cheek as I write this, I know I can't be broken. There's not an adversity in this life that you could throw at me that I won't tenaciously power through. Is there a chance this surgery doesn't work and I'm at risk for a knee replacement before 30? Yes. Fuck that though, man. I'm going to be the most diligent person in the world at my rehab, my diet, and most importantly, my mindset. I'll let go of the things I can't control. I'll immerse myself in the smallest of details in anything I can control. I know she won't remember, but every time my daughter looks at me, she will see a beacon of strength, no matter what. She won't hear me complain. She won't see me quit, ever. I can assure you I will make a 100% recovery. I know this is happening for a reason. This is happening for my benefit, even if I can't see it yet. I find true peace knowing this is setting me up for something great. For any athlete dealing with injury, I get it, believe me. There's something about the unknown that terrifies us. When you take the things away from us that we love, it cuts deep. We feel like a shriveled up version of ourselves. Not today though. Not ever again. Fear is normal, but I beat fear with action, reason, and purpose. I'll attack every day with my absolute best. Don't tell me what my odds of success are with this surgery. I already know my odds are 100%. I'm not sure about everyone else's odds, but my success is a guarantee. Watch me rise. I'll enjoy the process of it all.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff comfort me.

To Building Fortitude.

Warm regards,

Colin Jonov CEO & Founder, Athletic Fortitude

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